I thought this blog would be a good idea for me. I've felt lately like a one trick pony, a mommy pony who mothers and cares for and entertains, and kisses pony booboos. You get the idea. It is pretty much the best one trick to have if you happen to be a one trick pony. It does leave me asking though why just the one trick. Why not a several trick pony or at least a 2 trick pony! This analogy amuses me but is getting a little nuts. Alright I'll just come out and say it. I feel like I've lost a few qualities that used to be integral parts of Kristin Scoffield Baldwin. The first is my memory. I didn't know it at the time but I used to have a very sharp memory, especially when it came to people, names, places, movie lines, great literature plots/characters/metaphors/moments....I loved being a student and flying by the seat of my pants when writing for an impending deadline. I always did that to myself and it almost always paid off - usually wrote my best papers under pressure.
I think I'm a great mom and am loving it. I need spring to come and come now. Getting some sun, fresh air, and exercise is bound to help clear up this cloud following me around. Love.
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Friday, February 26, 2010
In a word...poop
It would be really easy to focus on the negative today since there were at least a dozen bodily fluid incidents including a screaming child clingy on for dear life to her panties that were tragically loaded with a giant poop. I could tell the story about how that was pretty much my fault but I'd rather just laugh now. The kids are in bed and we all survived with a few tears, several baths, and some chocolate cake. I'm surprised at the range of feelings I can have in a day or in the span of a minute. Total joy and hilarity and then the boredom and swamped feeling of the never ending messiness of the house. Not to mention the total lack of motivation to keep on top of things when literally not 2 minutes later a spic and span room can become a royal mess. That reminds me of something funny. Of course Ryanna is repeating anything we say, especially if it comes off in a way that she knows we shouldn't be saying it. Fortunately she mostly just corrects us - like using the taboo phrase Oh my gosh. She's been taught to use the exlamation oh my heavens but every so often Bri or I will say oh my gosh. We're promptly corrected with a disappointed look and reminder of "we say oh my heavens in this family." Alright back to the point. The other day I sighed and loudly exclaimed "this house is a royal mess!" Now on a daily basis Ryanna comments on the constant "royal mess" state of our home. It's funny but also a very unneeded reminder of my biggest nemesis: this dirty house!
Alright I'm gonna break away from wherever that was all going and try something I think would be good for me whenever I write a post. My favorites of the day.
FAVORITE Ryanna moments: a couple come to mind. Since Brian is out of town(in Cinci looking at a house we are buying) I rented us some redbox movies to ease the boredom. Ryanna sat on my lap and we watched Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs together. We sat in the recliner with her gigantic pink princess blanket on us and just laughed our heads off. That show is seriously hilarious and I think we'll put it on again tomorrow. I try to minimize the TV time but I also try to maximize the laughs around here sooooooooo why not get our dollars worth. Moment #2 shows her amazing ability to self entertain. She found a plastic bowl on the floor and experimented with watching it float to the floor dropping it through the bars halfway up the staircase. She squealed in excitement and would scream WEEEEEEE everytime as the bowl floated down. She is sooo bright and sunny. The soundtrack of her life includes lots of screaming, the insanely excited kind infused with giggles. It can pierce the ears and damage the hearing of the untrained but I try to focus on how beautiful that loud, enthusiastic approach to life is. After all I may have been an excited squealer of a child too! One more note is how much she adores her daddy. Brian called while she was laying with me in my bed before I had woke up. I told her we needed to go downstairs so I could get something for him. She ran to the stairs and called out for Bri. "Daddy!?!? I'm coming down to you!" I explained he wasn't in the house but she could talk to him on the phone. She's never liked talking on the phone and was very disappointed he wasn't home. Later she said out of nowhere "my dad will be here tonight for me." I explained he would actually be home tomorrow. Again a disappointed sigh. Finally we were getting ready for bed and she asked where dad was. We got out the map and looked at Ohio and where Cinci is. "I'm missing my dad. I'm missing my dad." Oh she is so sweet and says what she is thinking. No denying she loves Bri.
FAVORITE Quinten moments: His laugh!!!!! And today was full of laughs. Usually his laughs are directed at Ryanna but while Ryanna napped he and I spent about 30 straight minutes just rolling. Here's what we were doing: Quinten is experimenting with walking very short distances. I say it all the time: if Q wanted to, he could walk. He has the balance and strength. He just needs the confidence. So the laughter. He gets excited to the point of getting wound up and wild. His little limbs start moving and he gets excited like he could jump out of his own skin. This is how he gets when I encourage him to take steps on his own, to stand up unsupported, or walk between objects. So I was on all fours chasing him like a tiger and he was running holding on to the couch. When he would get to the edge he would take two or three quick little steps and throw himself onto Ryanna's chair, all the while laughing HYSTERICALLY. Once on the chair he would roll onto the ground and just chuckle uncontrollably. It was a moment I saw the toddler he is becoming and what a personality!! I was laughing hard myself and this only fed the frenzy. He even had tears in his eyes from laughing so hard. It was a great moment. The next that comes to mind is a daddy moment. I was on the phone with Bri and Quinten was crawling all over me on my bed. I was telling Brian about our mega poop episode, something I'm sure he's relieved he missed out on but also that he got a laugh out of. Anyway, I put the phone up to Quinten's ear so he could hear his dad. Once Brian started talking he stopped and just laid there, a rarity for this boy. He just focused for a little bit and then started grinning. He looked over at me with an excited "mom, it's dad!" twinkle in his eye. Brian asked him something and when he paused Quinten let out a definite Aaaahhhhh as a reply. He did this twice - it was so precious! He started crawling around again. a few minutes later he crawled up on me again. He had the remote and was holding it up to his ear just like Mom with her phone. So many moments I just wanna take a bite out of him and just eat him up! All that baby chub and cuteness! I can't get enough. Like I said before Quinten finds Ryanna hilarious to the max. While she was launching the bowl from the stairs he squealed with laughter. She would climb up the stairs to where we were sitting and give him a quick kiss before throwing the bowl. While she screamed WEEEEEEE, Quinten clapped and kicked and practically jumped out of his skin(and my arms) with excitement. The bond between those two shocks me sometimes, it is already so strong. Quinten's favorite place in the whole house(except maybe the bathroom which he has very limited access to for obvious reasons) is Ryanna's room. He is like a human tornado in there. A tornado on Christmas morning. It goes something like this: dump this, rip that, chew this, climb that, OOOO a crayon to eat, whoa something shiny, wonder if I can climb on the bed and then onto the bookshelf, etc. Ryanna is a good sport considering the damage to her personal goods. I hear lots of "MOM MOM stop him!" though she usually lets him explore and dump, just not when it comes to her art set and notebook. He is such an exploer and persistent to no end. If you don't want him to get it, then it needs to be at least 4 feet off the ground. He's a real go getter that kid!
FAVORITE Bri moment: I could hear his love for Cinci as he described his day, the food, and finding the perfect view of the skyline to take pictures. He's only been gone a day and a half and as he listened to the kids play and laugh he said he felt like the kids had grown up in that day while he was gone like he was missing everything. I'm glad he felt like that, felt the pull to be WITH his family, experiencing the daily chaos and energy of having a young family. We've missed him and it's just not the same without him here. For the kids yes but he's still a daily part of my life, my thoughts, and my heart. My hard working, handsome honey.
FAVORITE Me moment: Of all the movies I could have rented for myself I picked HP 6. Not surprising but I'm glad I'm still a kid like that. I honestly can't wait to read my favorite childrens books to my kids!
Wow! TIme to call it a night. Love to my kids, my hubby, my Heavenly Father and brother Jesus Christ, and love to little ol' me too.
Alright I'm gonna break away from wherever that was all going and try something I think would be good for me whenever I write a post. My favorites of the day.
FAVORITE Ryanna moments: a couple come to mind. Since Brian is out of town(in Cinci looking at a house we are buying) I rented us some redbox movies to ease the boredom. Ryanna sat on my lap and we watched Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs together. We sat in the recliner with her gigantic pink princess blanket on us and just laughed our heads off. That show is seriously hilarious and I think we'll put it on again tomorrow. I try to minimize the TV time but I also try to maximize the laughs around here sooooooooo why not get our dollars worth. Moment #2 shows her amazing ability to self entertain. She found a plastic bowl on the floor and experimented with watching it float to the floor dropping it through the bars halfway up the staircase. She squealed in excitement and would scream WEEEEEEE everytime as the bowl floated down. She is sooo bright and sunny. The soundtrack of her life includes lots of screaming, the insanely excited kind infused with giggles. It can pierce the ears and damage the hearing of the untrained but I try to focus on how beautiful that loud, enthusiastic approach to life is. After all I may have been an excited squealer of a child too! One more note is how much she adores her daddy. Brian called while she was laying with me in my bed before I had woke up. I told her we needed to go downstairs so I could get something for him. She ran to the stairs and called out for Bri. "Daddy!?!? I'm coming down to you!" I explained he wasn't in the house but she could talk to him on the phone. She's never liked talking on the phone and was very disappointed he wasn't home. Later she said out of nowhere "my dad will be here tonight for me." I explained he would actually be home tomorrow. Again a disappointed sigh. Finally we were getting ready for bed and she asked where dad was. We got out the map and looked at Ohio and where Cinci is. "I'm missing my dad. I'm missing my dad." Oh she is so sweet and says what she is thinking. No denying she loves Bri.
FAVORITE Quinten moments: His laugh!!!!! And today was full of laughs. Usually his laughs are directed at Ryanna but while Ryanna napped he and I spent about 30 straight minutes just rolling. Here's what we were doing: Quinten is experimenting with walking very short distances. I say it all the time: if Q wanted to, he could walk. He has the balance and strength. He just needs the confidence. So the laughter. He gets excited to the point of getting wound up and wild. His little limbs start moving and he gets excited like he could jump out of his own skin. This is how he gets when I encourage him to take steps on his own, to stand up unsupported, or walk between objects. So I was on all fours chasing him like a tiger and he was running holding on to the couch. When he would get to the edge he would take two or three quick little steps and throw himself onto Ryanna's chair, all the while laughing HYSTERICALLY. Once on the chair he would roll onto the ground and just chuckle uncontrollably. It was a moment I saw the toddler he is becoming and what a personality!! I was laughing hard myself and this only fed the frenzy. He even had tears in his eyes from laughing so hard. It was a great moment. The next that comes to mind is a daddy moment. I was on the phone with Bri and Quinten was crawling all over me on my bed. I was telling Brian about our mega poop episode, something I'm sure he's relieved he missed out on but also that he got a laugh out of. Anyway, I put the phone up to Quinten's ear so he could hear his dad. Once Brian started talking he stopped and just laid there, a rarity for this boy. He just focused for a little bit and then started grinning. He looked over at me with an excited "mom, it's dad!" twinkle in his eye. Brian asked him something and when he paused Quinten let out a definite Aaaahhhhh as a reply. He did this twice - it was so precious! He started crawling around again. a few minutes later he crawled up on me again. He had the remote and was holding it up to his ear just like Mom with her phone. So many moments I just wanna take a bite out of him and just eat him up! All that baby chub and cuteness! I can't get enough. Like I said before Quinten finds Ryanna hilarious to the max. While she was launching the bowl from the stairs he squealed with laughter. She would climb up the stairs to where we were sitting and give him a quick kiss before throwing the bowl. While she screamed WEEEEEEE, Quinten clapped and kicked and practically jumped out of his skin(and my arms) with excitement. The bond between those two shocks me sometimes, it is already so strong. Quinten's favorite place in the whole house(except maybe the bathroom which he has very limited access to for obvious reasons) is Ryanna's room. He is like a human tornado in there. A tornado on Christmas morning. It goes something like this: dump this, rip that, chew this, climb that, OOOO a crayon to eat, whoa something shiny, wonder if I can climb on the bed and then onto the bookshelf, etc. Ryanna is a good sport considering the damage to her personal goods. I hear lots of "MOM MOM stop him!" though she usually lets him explore and dump, just not when it comes to her art set and notebook. He is such an exploer and persistent to no end. If you don't want him to get it, then it needs to be at least 4 feet off the ground. He's a real go getter that kid!
FAVORITE Bri moment: I could hear his love for Cinci as he described his day, the food, and finding the perfect view of the skyline to take pictures. He's only been gone a day and a half and as he listened to the kids play and laugh he said he felt like the kids had grown up in that day while he was gone like he was missing everything. I'm glad he felt like that, felt the pull to be WITH his family, experiencing the daily chaos and energy of having a young family. We've missed him and it's just not the same without him here. For the kids yes but he's still a daily part of my life, my thoughts, and my heart. My hard working, handsome honey.
FAVORITE Me moment: Of all the movies I could have rented for myself I picked HP 6. Not surprising but I'm glad I'm still a kid like that. I honestly can't wait to read my favorite childrens books to my kids!
Wow! TIme to call it a night. Love to my kids, my hubby, my Heavenly Father and brother Jesus Christ, and love to little ol' me too.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
However yo usay it, being a mom is everything at once
I can't believe the range of emotions and feelings I ahve in one day. The most obvious and pervalent is love, for my husband yes but undeniably for my children always. It's an emotion that is always there, sometgimes on the surface and other times less obvious but always there. This presence is sometimes ironic and even my greatest source of guilt or confusion because in the same moment that I am feeling worried about the allergic reaction Ryanna is having I am also so frustrated that I am being ignored and so I snap a little. GIve her arm a little jerk or raise my voice in that way that I know she'll understand I am upset. Not my best moments and almost always the ones I regret immediately, not to mention the tears that well in her eyes. She is smart enough and has vocabulary enough now to call me out on these moments. Mom, be nice! It's like a repramand and I honestly feel it. I guess what it comes down to is that I am not the suprememly patient and perfect parent I used to think I was. One thing is for sure though(well two if you count that I am not perfect): I love these kids more than my heart has room to process. Or at least more than I know how to write. I have to write though. It's time I think to write again. Like a journal only less about the me who focused on me and more the me who mostly thinks about her family but needs to think a little about me too so I am starting this blog. PHEW that was a run on sentence!! You probably didn't catch what the heck I meant but then again if the you I'm referring to is myself then yes, I understand perfecttly and that is the point. Love to my kids. Love to my hubby. Love to my Heavenly Father and brother Jesus Christ. Love to myself too.
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